"Armageddon Survival Guide"


01. Your Facebook Can Kiss My Assbook
02. Cockroaches
03. Another Boring Day
04. Velcro Shoes
05. Sick of the Lies
06. They Hate Me
07. Aliens from Outer Space
08. I Love My Mom
09. The Dishwasher
10. The New Black
11. Left Handed Nazi's
12. No More Bullshit
13. To Prove That We Are Free
14. Canadian Hate-Triot

RATING: 7/10

Canadian punk vets DAYGLO ABORTIONS havd been around since the late seventies, egad. Kindred spirit crossover act CRYPTIC SLAUGHTER was but a blink along the way. It's been 12 years since the sardonic political mashers dropped their last album, "Holy Shiite", not counting "Live 2011" in the long interim. About their latest album "Armageddon Survival Guide", vocalist/guitarist Murray "The Cretin" Acton pulls no punches, as ever, in re-announcing the band to a contemporary hardcore audience that may need to click their way through a brush up of the band's history:

"Just like Armageddon, our new album has been rumored to be coming out for ages now. In fact it says in the Bible, that in the end times, the world will go totally to shit, everyone will be sinning their goddamned asses off, and they will all be listening punk bands like the DAYGLO ABORTIONS who clearly couldn't give a shit about God or the Devil. Now those aren't the exact words used of course. But that was a long time ago, and what the fuck did they know anyway. Anyway, those days are here, the world has gone to shit, Lady Gaga is rubbing her Satan worshiping vagina all over the Super Bowl, and the new DAYGLO album is out."

Keeping in mind DAYGLO ABORTIONS have weathered a criminal investigation of obscenity charges in Ontario for their "Here Today, Guano Tomorrow" album, this band truly has no care whatsoever for the mass majority's opinion—of them, or anything at all. The scandalous cover of "Feed Us a Fetus" says it all: it featured a baked fetus served to Ronald and Nancy Reagan. This, 1986, was when it was punk vogue worldwide to crush the Reagans, along with Henry Kissinger and Margaret Thatcher at any opportunity. Take a look at the cover of DAYGLO ABORTIONS' debut album, "Out of the Womb" and that of "Little Man in the Canoe", do we need say more? Well, other than 1991's "Two Dogs Fucking" just might be the pinnacle of punk hilarity, aside from THE EXPLOITED's Wattie Buchan's equally profane derisions of "Maggie" Thatcher.

"Armageddon Survival Guide" is tame by comparison to the old days in DAYGLO ABORTIONS, but not by much. "My Erection", "Homophobic Sexist Skinheads", "Isn't This Disgusting" and "Brick Shithouse Bouncers" seem impossible to top, even for DAYGLO ABORTIONS. Serving up the 58 second opening number "Your Facebook Can Kiss My Assbook" it stands to reason that the band needed extra downtime to catch up with current trends for scrutiny. Some of the album is stuffed with done-to-death anti-establishment ideals and don't-give-a-fuck uber angst, but that doesn't mean The Cretin isn't ready to get downright nasty. Honestly, has he ever backed away from confrontation? If you want the proof from way back, flip over the cover on "Here Today, Guano Tomorrow".

While DAYLGO ABORTIONS ripped into Osama Bin Laden on "Holy Shiite", this time, they dip their wicks into the muck and fling it upon President Barack Obama on "The New Black". Political jibes aside, this gets uncomfortably lowbrow as Murray Acton barks "It's no coincidence, he's the color of oil, Barack Barack, he's the new black…Black Panthers were tough, but not enough for Barack Barack, he's the new black." Later on "Left Handed Nazi's", Steve Jobs and Apple are branded "internet slumlords," Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper a corporate whore (one of Murray and DAYGLO ABORTIONS' all-time favorite phrases) on "Canadian Hate-Triot".

As always, the songs are fast and set to prototype hardcore schisms. "Velcro Shoes" pulls out some LYNYRD SKYNYRD twang for fun as Murray kvetches about the aging process. Prior to that, he hilariously pokes at apathy on "Another Boring Day" and spreads the smarm in the name of the financially downtrodden all over "Cockroaches". It may have taken a long time for DAYGLO ABORTIONS to come up with new material, but fans will be overall pleased by Murray Acton's declarations on "No Bullshit", much less his continuous wherewithal to shock.


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