"Anything That Moves"


01. Burn Them All (Intro)
02. Start a War
03. Lose Control
04. Dry Your Eyes
05. Mama (Don't Take My Drugs Away)
06. A Spider in the Dark
07. Show Me
08. Objectified
09. Turn Me On
10. You Don't Want to Know
11. Pray to the Devil
12. End of the World
13. Forgiven

RATING: 6.5/10

Virginia rockers BOBAFLEX might've been the first in line at their local sneak preview of "Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens" as they beat the film, release date-wise, to the punch by dialing up their sixth full-length, "Anything That Moves". A veteran bunch, BOBAFLEX can write sharp agro rock tunes stuffed with more hooks than the grappling apparatus of a Stormtrooper garrison. That being said, "Anything That Moves" is a chore to hang through.

"Start a War" is one of many metal songs these days taking a stand against homicidal zealotry. Here the banc demonstrates a surprising synchronicity between blunt force and placating serenity. The track is fierce yet harmonious with skyrocketing choruses announcing the end of days. If we're all gonna die, we might as well hold hands and hum our way to the end, right? "Lose Control", thereafter, comes knocking, literally, with a series of rapping beats setting off a pretty killer drive. As with "Start a War", BOBAFLEX turns out sweet sirens on their otherwise pissed-off choruses while cleaning house with banged-about rhythms on the verses.

A stomp-and-clap intro brings in a strutted-up spit upon, rejected muse serving up "Dry Your Eyes", and here is where "Anything That Moves" begins its downward spiral. A would-be radio jam along with the unquestionably stupid party anthem "Mama (Don't Take My Drugs Away)", BOBAFLEX shows they can write massive hooks, but they shoot themselves in the feet with inanity. "Show Me" has an amatory rock groove to plead against its love ‘em and leave ‘em keynote.

"Objectified" is another horny rocker about an older hottie who can pass for age 19, according to the BOBAFLEX posse, who, to paraphrase, hardly likes it clean. Here they serve up wailing guitar solos mimicking sex moans. The acoustic lucidity of "Turn Me On" is hardly the placid ballad it purports to be; like "Dry Your Eyes", the lyrics are spiteful and, frankly, boring—just as this album gets in the later parts, the swift "End of the World" notwithstanding. "You Don't Want to Know" is stacked with harmony, sure, but it lacks staunch. "Pray to the Devil" is anticlimactic as a would-be proto-pogo jam desperate to strike FM, particularly with the self-chastising "Forgiven" thereafter. All that transpires before is a set up for "Forgiven", yet the final petition for atonement is hardly a wash.

BOBAFLEX's blind devotion to carnality gives the title "Anything That Moves" automatic suspicion that the intended full sentence begins with “We'll shag.…” Not that every track is about humping or post-humping resentment, it's still a bitter pill since the BOBAFLEX gang can rock. Unfortunately, "Anything That Moves" goes nowhere past an angry spank inside a cold shower.


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