FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
Members of many top hard rock and heavy metal bands have united to endorse heavy metal parody webzine Infernal Combustion, sources revealed today.
"When you're tired of reading every burp and fart from our studio diary, IC is a fun diversion," comments VOIVOD bassist "Jasonic" Newsted. "They rip off the Onion pretty hardcore, but it's about heavy metal — what a concept!"
KREATOR's Mille Petrozza agrees. "If you've worn your fingers out typing GEORGE BUSH RULES!!!! comments based on my remarks about the Iraq conflict, why not go read some funny stories? And if you can't find any funny stories, read Infernal Combustion."
BRIDES OF DESTRUCTION's Nikki Sixx took a moment from hiring and firing band members to say "since 1999, Infernal Combustion has made fun of all the ridiculous aspects of hard rock and heavy metal. They're meaner to Vince Neil than I am, which is tough to do."
Axl Rose was scheduled to cut the ribbon on IC's latest issue, the 27th, at a special ceremony on Thanksgiving Day. According to sources within the GUNS camp, Rose's plane is "almost in the air." Rioting Infernal Combustion fans have caused an estimated $9 in damages, but access to the site remains clear.
Site founder Keith Bergman was busy thinking up excuses why this issue was so late, and why the next one will probably be even later, and was unavailable for comment.
[Note: This is obviously a parody press release. If you didn't figure that out, we encourage you to visit some other site instead. Chuck E. Cheese has a fun one.]
Site: Infernal Combustion
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
To comment on a BLABBERMOUTH.NET story or review, you must be logged in to an active personal account on Facebook. Once you're logged in, you will be able to comment. User comments or postings do not reflect the viewpoint of BLABBERMOUTH.NET and BLABBERMOUTH.NET does not endorse, or guarantee the accuracy of, any user comment. To report spam or any abusive, obscene, defamatory, racist, homophobic or threatening comments, or anything that may violate any applicable laws, use the "Report to Facebook" and "Mark as spam" links that appear next to the comments themselves. To do so, click the downward arrow on the top-right corner of the Facebook comment (the arrow is invisible until you roll over it) and select the appropriate action. You can also send an e-mail to blabbermouthinbox(@)gmail.com with pertinent details. BLABBERMOUTH.NET reserves the right to "hide" comments that may be considered offensive, illegal or inappropriate and to "ban" users that violate the site's Terms Of Service. Hidden comments will still appear to the user and to the user's Facebook friends. If a new comment is published from a "banned" user or contains a blacklisted word, this comment will automatically have limited visibility (the "banned" user's comments will only be visible to the user and the user's Facebook friends).