"War Metal Battle Master"

(Southern Lord)

RATING: 5.5/10

Let's be honest here, the real reason you want to watch this DVD is because of the naked, blood-spattered Keres. The fact that Chicago's LAIR OF THE MINOTAUR is bashing out the title track from its third righteous album of barbarian metal is probably secondary. Maybe that's an exaggeration, as surely some of you will marvel at the censored and uncensored versions of the video because of the Greek mythology tale told, the old-school and wonderfully campy foreign horror movie action (think "Cannibal Holocaust"), and a no-frills, bullshit-free display of true heavy metal.

In that regard, the video — set to the backdrop of a battlefield scene descended upon by the demons from Hades in all their cannibalistic glory — is pretty damn entertaining, as is the behind-the-scenes footage, which happens to include more than a few glimpses of the actresses' goodies (and it ain't incidental). The rest of the DVD contains live footage of largely bootleg quality taken from shows in support of the "Carnage" and "The Ultimate Destroyer" tours from across the globe and is, for the most part, of marginal value even for the staunchest fans.

It's not like the DVD will break the bank, but you might want to put a little thought into the purchase decision due to the fact that, at a minimum, you can see the uncensored video on the Net. You'll miss out on the behind-the-scenes stuff though. Mind you, this is coming from an admitted LAIR OF THE MINOTAUR devotee, so I'm a little torn. When it comes right down to it the question is one of bang for the buck and there just isn't a whole lot of bang here, personal fantasies about the Keres notwithstanding.


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